From the Age of Innocence..........the Wisdom of Mem

From the Age of Innocence...........the Wisdom of Mem!

Every kid in the neighborhood, knew Mem......she was iconic. Loving, understanding, quick tempered, a no nonsense personality, you always knew where you stood with her.  Short in stature with a softness in those loving eyes, Memere Delia better known as Mem, was the best grandmother.

Married at barely eighteen, the era of her youth considered the young woman past the marrying age, she was a "spinster." As the oldest daughter in a family that would eventually have sixteen kids, Mem's role was clearly defined; cook, clean, babysit, be a Mom.  Although she relished the role, her spirited nature yearned for the open road.  

As a single Mom of two, the depression years took their toll on family life.  Mem and her husband parted ways, Mem saying, "he gave me two beautiful kids, I want nothing more from that bastard!"  It wasn't until my early teen years, more personal info about the man would be shared.

Mem travelled far to find work. Her children in a boarding school, she did what she had to.  By today's standards, she was a personal chef, fact is the woman worked long hard hours, cooking for the "well to do."  No shame, just toughened the woman.  As times seemingly became better, she became more determined.  She returned home, kids no longer in boarding school, her mother and siblings, assisting with child care, it was now one big happy family.

Although my grandmother still spent an enormous amount of time away from her children, time spent in their company was nurturing, loving and by all accounts, quality. Mem's son, Roland, succumbed to polio, age ten much too young, his passing left deep wounds within my mother and grandmother's hearts.  

Life moves forward at a furious pace, times changed, economic outlook brightened, Mem found work close to home, her only child, my mother, forever thankful, her prayers answered. Continuing to live under her parents roof, Mem's younger brothers, became surrogate brothers to my mother; funny how blessed one can be!

Her childhood years filled with responsibilities, Mem, never had the opportunity to experience childhood, those years developed much to quickly. Yet, with the move back to her mother's house, she had the opportunity to grow with her only daughter.  They shared a bond like no other.  In later years as a grandmother, her playfulness, wit and street wise charm, passed lovingly to her granddaughters.

Always quick to offer her opinion, her mind remained sharp, she was an open-minded modern woman, evolving with the times.  Health issues plagued her but her wisdom was amazing.  She felt if she had to do it all over again, she'd work twice as hard and play even harder.  Her siblings often asking her opinion, they cherished her wisdom. Speaking with her younger sister after Mem's passing, she reminded me of my grandmother's wisdom and what she had accomplished.  She too missed the woman she said, she had a "wisdom beyond her years!"

Recently a much younger peer approached me asking for an opinion. After answering her questions, sorting all possibilities, she smiled and offered a thank you!" I always know you will be there and assist me, right, wrong or indifferent, you have years of experience and such wisdom!"  I hadn't thought of my opinions being full of wisdom and I secretly smiled knowing I might have listened to Mem and trusted her judgment.  As my peer turned and walked away, I smiled, sighed and quietly whispered, "thanks Mem, love and miss you bunches!"